Married for God
Married for God:
Making your marriage the best it can be
By Christopher Ash (172 pages, IVP 2007)
This book is not just for those thinking about getting married, it is designed for anyone. Ash puts God first, and helpfully begins with God’s grace at work in those who put their trust in him. We are all broken by sin, and we each bring our own baggage into our relationships. God’s grace is sufficient for every one of us, no matter what. That’s a great place to start!
There is a very helpful chapter on the purpose of marriage, drawn from a survey of the scriptures: Marriage is
- For children (although of course this may not result for some)
- For relationship (seeking to serve God)
- And for the good order of society.
Chapter five is really some of the best commentary I’ve read on the biblical teaching on the roles of husband and wife: “God’s pattern for the marriage relationship.” Ash summarises and explains some of the Bible’s key passages (1 Peter 3, Ephesians 5 and Colossians 3).
Humans were created “equal, but different.” Often in weddings people gravitate to 1 Corinthians 13 ( love is patient …etc), but we should be tackling the passages that specifically address husbands and wives.
It may seem politically incorrect in today’s climate to talk about submission, but the biblical view is meant to be intensely beautiful. It “undermines equally the oppression of male chauvinism and the false dawn of aggressive secular feminism.” [1] All Christians are called to submission. This is not a passive thing – it is meant to be both active and voluntary. The wife who does this is living out her creational role, as is the husband who gives his life for her – as Christ loved the church. To jettison the first as ‘culturally inappropriate’ or outdated, would be to also omit the second. These acts of sacrifice are at the heart of love itself, and in this way Christian marriage reflects God’s good intentions and profound love for his people.
The chapter on singleness outlines how you can serve God differently if you are unmarried and remain as such– but one does not serve God any better in either case. The final chapters outline faithfulness as the core to any marriage – as a reflection of God’s ultimate faithfulness. There is grace when we fail and a faithful God who we can turn to in all things.
- Andy Buchan
[1] 84
